Yesterday I saw a funny wall poster in a mall that said “The biggest regrets in life are the things I didn’t buy”. Funny. Well, I recently learnt a precious lesson on how we ought to relate to material things in life and just want to jot it down before I forget it.
It was my usual Sunday facilitators session and we were preparing notes on Philippians. W, who is finishing up his theology degree and the most diligent of us in preparing notes for each study (I am less regular) was sharing with us that according to a certain Christian teacher, the bible teaches us that helping the poor is not a matter of charity (i.e. voluntary) but justice (i.e. essential). The shoe in our cupboard we have not worn for eons and the food we throw away uneaten are all what we owe the poor. He went on to elaborate why this was so (e.g. often, the poor are that way because of the circumstances they were born in or found themselves in, and not through any lack in personal traits) and assured us that the teacher provided lots of bible verses as reference, which we could check out if we watched the video.
To me, this was the missing piece of the puzzle in my mind on how we should treat material possessions and wealth. Living in Singapore, a country that is as pragmatic and unabashed as they come in its goal to seek and maximise material prosperity (I think even China is more ideological than us), I have been convinced since my JC days that life must be about more than just pursuing material riches. I mentally checked out of this rat race a long time ago and had no trouble accepting the Christian teaching on the deceitfulness of wealth and not pursuing mammon as our God. However I could not find any teachings about not being incidentally wealthy as there are characters in the Bible who were so (eg Job, King Solomon, Abraham) although in my mind I just couldn’t gel a godly person who would at the same time live in a luxury condo (what are you trying to prove? Do you NEED to stay in one? Why not give the money to the poor or a good cause?) or driving a luxury car (same questions). However thus far it seemed like a matter of personal preference, something to be settled between them and God, with no absolute benchmark, and hence I have kept my mouth shut amidst conversations around me of upgrading, going on expensive holidays one after another, and what not. At the same time, I secretly admired the saints throw themselves wholeheartedly into a good cause or who invite the poor into their lives and share everything with them.
So here was a teaching that tells us anytime we have abundance we ought not to gather more but to share. Ok, I Guess different people may have different barometers on what constitutes abundance but it is still a starting point. For me, this settles a Long-Nagging problem of mine and now I am calmly settled in my mind as to how I should treat riches and material things. Have and keep what is necessary, and give away the rest. What liberating teaching!!!
The next step is figuring how this gels with my life with my husband, who umm… doesn’t quite see things the same way I do. Granted I haven’t quite shared this with him yet. I probably should although I wonder if it would make much difference. He drives a luxury car (cos he has to meet investor clients for work) and aspires to live in a condo. So much so that we bought a very expensive penthouse which will be ready by end of the year. Can’t quite back out now. The good thing is he is very open to discussing things with me, but he may not agree with me at the end of the day and I can only advise, not control him. If he insists on doing certain things in ways, we will just have to agree to disagree and to prevent civil strife, I’ll go along with his decision. Which means I’ll be one of those Christians living in a penthouse and owning a luxury car 😟. One of life’s ironies. The silver lining I can see in this is that we will be spending so much of our monthly income on house and car that it will result in us having much less money to spend and hence conversely, we may end up becoming even more generous to the poor, as we will have less in our bank account. Sometimes the more we have, the harder it is to let go. So I can still practice what the Christian teacher said about living simply and giving away unused things but just that we will have much less to give away compared to if we were living in a HDB flat or condo that is less expensive.
So ultimately, it is between us and God. We have to give a reckoning and an answer to God in every decision we made including on stewardship of resources so we just have to be able to live with ourselves.
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