The Most Important Parenting Book I Have Ever Read

Dear all,

I have just finished reading 2 exciting books and watched a really good movie:

(a) Circle by Dave Eggers
(a) How Children Succeed by Paul Tough (what a name!)
(c) The Imitation Game (movie starring Benedict Cumberbatch!)

It is strange how these 3 books/movies talk about similar concepts in slightly different ways, which mesh and meld into several revelations -

And reading them has convinced me that the most important parenting book I have ever read was this book called "The Baby Book" by Dr William and Martha Sears, and that attachment parenting is the most important and valuable parenting concept I have ever come across (next to the importance of prayer for our kids!).

How Children Succeed is a fascinating book, although I do wish it didn't focus quite so much on academics. But the interesting thing is the importance it gives to attachment to caregivers in early life. I Guess it's quite instinctive, that we should want to protect and nurture the little ones when they are youngest and give them a safe environment to grow up in. However common sense is not so common nowadays with the proliferation of parenting books and styles, especially those that espouse the cry-it-out method at an early age. There is much research to show that that responding in a warm and prompt manner to a very young baby is critical in ensuring they calm down fast and come to think that the world is a safe and predictable place. Not having to worry their needs will be met also allows them to focus their energies on exploring the world and learning. Conversely, leaving a baby to cry and neglected and left alone, not held, for Long periods, repeatedly, causes them not to form secure attachments with their caregiver and not to develop the core part of the brain properly, the part that regulates emotions. This actually goes on to affect their cognitive abilities quite significantly later, not to mention there is probably some emotional scarring. Just imagine, have you ever tried to debug a conplicated excel spreadsheet while under stress? Affects your ability to think doesn't it? That's how early neglect and stress affect a baby's cognitive abilities later on. So it is Soo important that we are healthily attached to our infants and not worry they are trying to manipulate us (below one year old, they can't) or that we are losing our independence (just one year and it will reap immense benefits later on in the kid's life!).

And hence I have been led to conclude that "The Baby Book" which talks all about the science and techniques behind attachment parenting, amongst other helpful tips and knowledge on taking care of your baby the first two years, is the most important parenting book I have ever read :)